M 50

1 AUTUMN v GREAT GONZO 2 LUCRETIA v GREAT GONZO The Only Man Who Can Save World Wrestling is back again to rouse the spirits of every red-ed male! For only he is man enough to stem the tide of assertive feminism - a tide which he feels may well yet submerge us all. Autumn is the personification of this trend. Aggressive, attractive and strong, she's a challenge which our hero must accept in the name of men everywhere. Unfortunately however Gonzo proves better at talking (who else can deliver a running commentary with his face between the cheeks of his opponent's buttocks) than at wrestling, and the r man is soon staring not only at Autumn's backside, but also at total defeat. Lengthy periods of face-sitting and breast-facesit are the hallmark of this match and soon Gonzo is falling back on that old excuse of the defeated wrestler 'I can't breathe!' But no alibi can conceal his utter humiliation. Our hero fares better in his match with the smaller but feisty Lucretia. Honours are evenly-shared with neither wrestler gaining a submission. But that doesn't mean he escapes scot-free; there's more face-sitting and at one stage the ageing warrior is press to plead for mercy which Lucretia graciously grants, thus enabling him to press a draw.